Give up your financial security for love – who does that!?🤯🤥

Hey! Hold your gun powder ok? Ain’t here to judge…just wanted to ehrrm, grab your attention with that header😉

So on to the business of this post. Should you give up your financial security for love? What are the drivers? What are the considerations? Sorry darla, only you can answer those questions, not me. Surprised by my bluntness?

Thing is, there are no right or wrong answers to this one. This is a question of what works for A may not work for B. You see, in this thing called life, there are a few definite boundaries on issues and a lot of grey areas in between with room for flexibility. I mean, I was in a convo with female cohorts at work the other day and the discussion turned on precisely this issue. As you can imagine, this is a dilemma faced more by women than men especially when married. Ask me how?

Generally, when a man wants to make a career or financial decision that requires relocation for instance, his family constraints are not so much a biggie. Not saying they are not important – mind you. After all, many a man would tell you that their family is their number one priority. Where your treasure is your heart would be in’it? But the fact is that society expects the family to up and follow the man wherever he chooses. Not so for the woman. The woman cannot move with such ease especially where children are involved. As society’s primary caregiver, there are issues around their schooling and the likes to consider. I won’t be cheeky and add that ‘never mind that the children belong to both her and hubby not just her – perhaps moreso the hubby since they bear his name not hers’ Anyway, I digress.

Ordinarily, it should be a no brainer for the woman to sacrifice career for family. But when it’s a high paying career – perhaps even higher paying than hubby’s – it’s no longer as clear cut. See? A lot of grey areas in life sho get? So this cohort were exactly in this position so the answer wasn’t so easy. Some said they would sacrifice career. Some said they would, only if they got a good or better career elsewhere. Some bluntly said they won’t ‘cos their financial security is important to you know, avoid yeye that smell.

I bet some that may be quick to judge anyone who refuses to sacrifice financial security for love may pause for a second, when the financial stakes in question are very high. Just drives home the point that we should not be too quick to judge another before we walk in their shoes. Also brings to bear that the person who may be said to have done the right thing, may only have done so because it was very convenient to do so – e.g because there was either no job or a there was only a low paying job to consider. If such person had a high paying job, a different decision may have been made by such person.

Don’t forget – the value of decisions are appreciated when the stakes are very high.

So would you give up your financial security for love?

Ultimately, this is an issue of ‘to each their own.’ As I always say, whatever you decide, own it with your full chest. It’s one of the benefits of adulthood – personal accountability. But it would be wise to consult with your partner before deciding sha.



*image credit:

Where is the love?

People killing, people dying; children hurt, can you hear them crying? can you practice what you preach? And would you turn the other cheek…’ These were the lyrics that resonated across my mind as I prepared soul and body for another week.

Recent happenings around me have made me reflect on the need for tolerance, patience and other virtues that should be held dear. Live and let live as it were.

Still feeling reflective, I sign out with these lyrics I learnt over a decade and half ago: ‘Let there be love shared amongst us, let there be love in our eyes, may now your love sweep this nation, cause us o Lord to arise. Give us a fresh understanding of brotherly love that is real, let there be love shared among us, let there be love…’

Let there be love!

Communication gap

One February 14, in the spirit of agape love rather than a lack of more fun alternatives, I assisted a senior colleague to review an article.

About four hours down the line (yea, the review was that intense!), I happily sent my response by clicking the reply button and for back-up, even informed the colleague by text message that my job was done. I then proceeded to enjoy the rest of my day and weekend as it were.

Would you believe it, on Monday morning, I received a call from this colleague that the document had not been received; and imagine my surprise. At the point of re-sending the document to this colleague, I discovered some extra letters in the name which had gone unnoticed simply because I merely hit reply without reviewing that important detail. Communication gap indeed you might say.

Another lesson I learnt from that experience, is the need to constantly review everything we sign off on, particularly when we did not make them. So beware of those emails a colleague prepares and directs you to send, because embedded in the words, may just be some embarrassing typos or issues that may come back to haunt you.

Cheers to a fulfilling week.