Chances are that whatever your station in life or gender is, you have had to negotiate your way out of one unfavourable situation or the other. If for some unlikely reason you haven’t, I assure you that this is one test of wits you cannot escape as long as you are a living being.

So, how does one meander one’s way out of sticky situations?

Well, I would be lying if I told you I had a quick fix, one-size-fits-all answer😁But there are principles I have applied personally which have worked for me – whether at work or at home.

One principle I know does not work is arguing because then, chances are that there would be a clash of egos and if only to ‘save face’ at that moment, your counter party may not agree with you and do your bidding.

So I seek first to understand the person’s view by putting myself in his or her shoes. I even ask hypothetical questions/paint scenarios that reflect his/her thinking. Then, because there are always at least two sides to a story, I also present the alternative scenario to get the person to wear my own shoes and understand my perspective.

Does it always work? Well many times, the counter party at least listens and considers my view point. Will s/he do my bidding? Sometimes but not always. But at least we can converse like adults and take an informed rather than a pure egoistic decision. Of course sometimes too, after considering my counter party’s view, I also shift ground from mine.

You see, this life is give and take. Ultimately, bear in mind that you can’t avoid negotiating your way through life also noting that you would always lose 100% of the chances that you do not take.

Cheers.

Best,

Adefolake

*image credit: http://www.google.com